SHE’LL PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE
SHE’S MISS AMERICA CHAVEZ
After seeing a strange but convincing post on her dash, Sarah decides to test its theory. She begins holding her breath—an easy task for a first-chair clarinet—and carefully clicks “reblog”. The post becomes lighter as the loading icon appears, spinning in the center like the circle of life itself. Suddenly, her computer shuts down as it runs out of battery. The girl frantically begins searching for her laptop charger, still holding her breath with a determined will. She won’t lose this fight. As her computer begins to turn on, she pounds the wall beside her in frustration as she notices the Windows mandatory update screen—once a simple annoyance, it is now the key that seals her fate. “Come on, come on!” she whispers, afraid to use up too much of her precious air supply, now dwindling as the percentage slowly increases. 35%. Her lungs are on fire, but she cannot give up. 50%. Black spots begin to cloud her vision. 70%. Feeling faint, she leans back and tries to keep her racing mind focused on the task at hand. 85%. Mere seconds remain. 99%. … Just as it hits 100%, her screen comes to life, but the girl can’t take it anymore and promptly passes out, knocking over the poorly-placed lit candle on her dresser. It ignites the pile of school papers on the ground, and within minutes the whole house is ablaze. Fortunately, Sarah lives alone, and only one life is taken in the tragic accident. It’s a shame that she put so much trust in the internet with such a personal matter as kissing. Perhaps she should’ve just asked her girlfriend instead, thus saving all of this trouble.
reblog or sarah’s lips will haunt you and give you bad luck for eight years
welcome to night vale
My dad just said: at your age you’ll probably wanna try a lot of things. Boys, girls, being a girl, being a boy, being punk or goth or spunky. And im okay with that. As long as you don’t come home and tell me youre a republican
parents who care
Now that’s a morals and values lesson
It’s not cute or gracefull either it’s as if you actually body slammed into them its uncomfortable and painfull
Captain America: The Winter Soldier Trivia Click gifs for more trivia in captions
to just cuddle up in bed with you and forget everything would be nice
We know one thing. Hagrid never opened the Chamber of Secrets. He was innocent.
A ‘Ring of Fire’ solar eclipse is a rare phenomenon that occurs when the moon’s orbit is at its apogee: the part of its orbit farthest away from the Earth. Because the moon is so far away, it seems smaller than normal to the human eye. The result is that the moon doesn’t entirely block out our view of the sun, but leaves an “annulus,” or ring of sunlight glowing around it. Hence the term “annular” eclipse rather than a “total” eclipse.
2 am thoughts (via timid) —